Have you ever looked at a couple and invariably wondered 'How the heck did someone like that end up with someone like that?'
Well, here's the explanation.
1. Beautiful people are narcissists...they cannot stand the thought of being out done by someone, especially not their better halves!
2. They love being the center of attention...and they know pretty well, that 'that' thing isn't really gonna get any luckier so they're assured of undivided attention at all times.
3. They're human...and obviously easily jealous. It's so much easier to be with someone who is so out of depth with them that they couldn't evoke any jealousy...a little pity maybe!
And a host of other deviant reasons.
But eventually, these are the happiest of couples...the beast cant take eyes off the beauty...I mean, if you can get as lucky as that and yet keep it simple, who needs to be beautiful, right?
If you wanna wake up early and you have set an alarm, like me, I'm sure a lot of you too have trouble rising with the alarm. I blame it on our dreams. Inevitably, the mind does dream rather prolifically in the morning. So if you're in the middle of a good dream, you lounge around the bed a little longer hoping to see out the rest of it. On the contrary, if you're having a bad dream, you wanna lounge around longer because you figure, now that I'm awake, I might as well fix this dream up with a happy ending. Sadly, on both counts, we end up losing to the time-bound realities of societal life... ~Sigh~ Whoever you are that wants me to wake up early in the morning, know this, I'm not late because I am tardy, I'm late early in the mornings because of the sub-conscious nature of my dreams! And if you have no trouble waking up in the morning, that's just sad. Largely because it means you don't dream enough...and as a recent research report by some fancy western university suggests, the most intelligent people are the ones that dream the most!
(Of course, this also implies that I'm one of the most intelligent people on the planet since I seem to indulge in plenty of day-dreaming in addition to all the regular dreaming at night!) :P
If you ever find yourself heading to an over-crowded public loo, (most likely at the theatres, bus-stands, expressway food-malls, railway stations or on the rarest of occasions, perhaps a public loo along the way when you're running the Mumbai Marathon,) here's a tip that'll probably help you find a booth the fastest. Always line up behind the booth occupied by the skinniest guy there. He's bound to be done the fastest! After all, he's slim, so he'll be able to unzip and zip up faster, (his clothes, are obviously likely to be easily maneuverable,) ((and he'd probably be able to handle his tool the best too...after all, there's gotta be little hiding the view from him right?))
DISCLAIMER:> Nothing personal against the not-so skinny ones! :P
I'm sure you know how much I love driving around on my bike...and yes, I will accept, it isn't the hottest, head-turning piece of machinery on the streets and for the longest time, I thought I was in love with the reverberating engine and the slight misfire that gave it such a throaty feel. But it was today that I figured why I loved it so much. It doesn't reach blistering speeds and would probably be outrun on a straight patch of road by bigger engined bikes but the thrill of my bike, lies in the acceleration. She might only do 80kmph but she can sure race up to the 80. Life is somewhat like that isn't it? It's never fun to run at 210kph on a straight line, it's more fun to race up to 80 on a piece of winding road. Even in life, I reckon it's more fun getting to goals than it is whilst you're basking in the glory of your achievements. Or something like that...I'm a little too hungry to expand this further...make do with this much now, I hope you get the gist of what I was trying to say. Acceleration is more fun than constant speed!
Have you noticed, whenever you're at a traffic signal and the signal turns green, the people at the front, always seem to react slower than the people at the back, who always seem to be irritated at the people in front and hence honk away to glory! Life's kinda like that sometimes, isn't it? People who are at the head of the order seem to be in no rush to get anywhere and the people lower down, really wanna get ahead real fast...the people at the back, in all their eagerness, would more often than not, cut everyone off to make it to the head of the order! The people in front though just don't seem to mind the delay cause they know they're ahead and will go further for sure, sooner or later! And quintessentially, they aren't any different from those at the back... Funny how the same people can behave differently in different situations huh?
"All visits to a hill-station must be separated by a time difference punctuated by a change of at least one Cell-phone owned between the visits!"
Elaborately, do not carry the same cell-phone to a hill-station if you're heading for a repeat visit! If you do, you'll probably be seeing the same sights and if you're with the same people, you'll have absolutely no opportunity for newer snaps! I made the mistake and pretty much found some pretty good pics already stored in the memory! How pathetic is that?
Well anyways, just got back from an awesome vacation with my folks and my cousins from Bombay. Food was good, the weather was awesome, the place was scenic and the best part of it all, there was no cell-phone connectivity! So it was just me, music and my shoes! Did a lotta walking around! Think I've worn my shoes out and though it was a great opportunity, the fact that I wasn't carrying my phone with me, has meant I've got no rhymes to show for it! Ah well, did a lotta thinking though and I think I've found the secret to life! Should I share it??? Of course I will, just lemme fine tune it a bit! :)
I was wondering why we fight so much with the people we love most...is it the burden of expectations that drives us to the limit causing tensions to flare? Well, sort of. I think, the reason for misunderstandings and the resulting tensions, is a lack of understanding. As we get closer to people, we learn more about them. After a certain point, we start simulating their behavior in our mind, expecting and foretelling what they might or perhaps, ought to do! And when the results of the simulation are not quite the same as the reactions in real time, there are disagreements and arguments. I believe, in a relationship, the degree of comfort shared is directly proportional to the amount of error we provide for in our simulations. In other words, the amount of freedom we are willing to give. The lesser the expectations, the better is it. The thing is, we can never hope to fully understand another human, no matter how long you've known them because we are such complicated beings. Is it a wonder then, that the most comfortable relationships are those that are casual and have tons of space and the least amount of expectations?
What is being immortal? I mean think about it realistically and with practical relativity. To a mortal being, immortal is anything that existed before they did and lasts even after they're gone. With this frame of reference in mind, if someone was born one day before me and died one day after, for me, that person would've been immortal... Simple isn't it?
Here's a four step guide - 1. Have 3 cups of coffee (I get high on caffeine so coffee is what works for me! You can choose whatever leaves you slightly, and I stress 'slightly' inebriated.) 2. Listen to some music that you really like. (It helps if the music is not very upbeat! Downright morose helps! If you're gonna write, inspiring lyrics help in a big way!) 3. Drive down to your favourite, scenic, isolated destination where you can be alone. (On rare occasions the company of your muse helps...although, on most occasions, the visit is sabotaged because you end up having a great time with them and you return happy.) 4. Recall some of your saddest memories...
Well, I didn't say getting out of ma writer's block was easy! We are at our most creative when we are at our unhappiest! What can I say?
All men are ambitious and would like to achieve something substantial in life...but here's the thing, the only reason men want anything is the pursuit of women. Eventually, there are 3 outcomes- 1.They get what they were chasing but they were so busy chasing, they lost the woman... 2.They get the woman but they were so busy with the woman they lost what they were chasing... 3.They either get both or neither but lose themselves... Sad I know but a cent percent true!
Saturday, August 22, 2009
I read this, "One day your life is going to flash before your eyes. Make sure its a good show" on Subodh's blog and this was my comment there
You know what, they tell you your whole life flashes before your eyes in those last minutes but they're wrong...your mind is just thinking about the next minute not what went past...you know when your life flashes before your eyes? When you're taking a walk on the beach with the sand in your toes and the breaking waves in your ears...and you know what you see? Those long walks on the beach with the sand in your toes and the breaking waves in your ears! So you know it's gonna be a good show, rest assured!
Have you spent hours wondering why the good looking ones are hooked onto the not-so-good looking ones? I have a theory... On the social circle, you're either a hunter or the prey... The hunters are those aggressive characters that are on the prowl all the time for the docile ones to pass by. When they find the weakest link, they attack and capture... Don't be mistaken though...the good looking ones are the hunters most often. They might pretend to be otherwise but don't let them fool you... If you aren't the timid, docile one and aren't really the predator either, rest assured you shall remain single! This theory needs a little ironing...it's difficult to post from a mobile phone...more to follow as soon as i get my hands on a computer!
There are two kinds of people, the first who are near-sighted, their joys lie in the little stuff...the other who are far-sighted, their joys lie in the big matter...the near-sighted are so blind, they don't know where their joys lie even when they are standing on it...the far-sighted are so blind, by the time they reach what they once thought was their joy, they see their joy in the distance...and so it is thus, that one set of people move from one day to the next, floundering, not knowing where to go, finding their joy in what happened yesterday...the other set know where they want to be so well, that when they move from one day to the next, they're already looking at the day beyond...and so lies today forgotten...any takers?
"Information is wielded as power by lesser mortals trying to assert themselves as greater than those that actually are."
Disagree if you must but that is the truth. Those using information assymetry to their advantage are simply afraid and know they are inept at being competitive in a fair contest. They will do everything they can to ensure that there never exists a state of transparency and create a situation where one person knows more than the other, the one person being them of course! Oh, and if you meet someone along the way who will use the phrase 'INFORMATION IS POWER' to justify whatever it is they are doing, please slap the impotent fool for me...or send them a link to this post.
I guess things have simmered down to a large extent for this post to make sense or maybe things have finally begun to take concrete shape by now to warrant this line of thought…
I suppose everyone is aware of the terrorist attacks and more so the hue and cry that the common man has or rather more aptly ‘had’ raised. The one birdie that couldn’t get away and gave a bunch of evidence for us Indians that the attack was orchestrated by our neighbors Pakistan’s guests. Yet, against them the gracious hosts refuse to accept any condemning evidence being provided by India and now, even from their long time allies, the US.
Now that the background is in place (not that it needed to be laid in the first place but…) the part that really troubles me. In all the circles that I know and am a part of, the common Indian man almost everywhere seems to be in support of the idea of waging a war. The act perpetrated by the fanatics that chose to slaughter soft targets was in the easiest of terms, cowardly, nonetheless, war against our neighbors with the intention of prevention of such acts in the future would not only be unwise but would also mean that the perpetrators have gotten to us. The act of war is the final step in cynicism for humanity, the final attempt of humans who feel threatened and need to force their authority on others. As Indians, the acts of terrorism against us, are a mere manifestation of how threatened these extremists feel with the show of solidarity within the country, the much celebrated ‘Unity in Diversity.’ These acts of terror are mere flashes in the pan that fail to threaten us in any way, unless of course we choose to take cognizance of their actions. What does a war mean? Does it mean we are threatened by these acts of terror against us? Do we think that a war against them is the way we are strengthening our beliefs or is it to soothe our egos?
What ends would a war meet? Zilch…because all the war will do is aggrieve the other party. In a bid to eradicate the fanatics, we would also perhaps slay some of the innocent. Tactically it would mean that they would find more reason to perpetrate more lies and subvert more minds. Would be a downright disaster. Moreover, the lives lost in such terror attacks are but a few as compared to the number of lives that would be lost should there be a full-scale war. Even after the war, effective control of the captured territories would be rather difficult as even the US has found out after numerous misadventures be it Nam, Iraq or Afghanistan and Russia in Bosnia, Georgia et al. For us, having conflict areas within the borders is a lot worse than having them outside.
In the same breath, I do not mean that there should be no action against these terror attacks. I just believe there should be a slightly different approach to tackling this menace, the way we are going about it. It isn’t outside our borders that we need be wary, if we are strong within, we would be twice as secure. A lot being said about something concrete being needed to be done…not much in terms of what could actually be done…
on the one hand, we could take strict measures in terms of security and ensure draconian checks and a military discipline in the nation ensuring no more terrorist attacks. This would come at a price, like being subject to frisking wherever we go, from cinema theatres to shopping malls; and the added cost of the freedom we currently enjoy being curbed. Should this actually be done, life as we know it would cease to be. We’d no longer feel secure the way we do now…and dont tell me you feel insecure for a few terrorist attacks…if you do, you let these terrorists win.
We have now started viewing our fellow passengers with a suspicious eye and viewomg every bag of luggage with a hint of fear. The fact that we have reached such a stage is in itself a little sad but between the two evils, I reckon this is the lesser. The best act of defiance would be to continue life as usual as if nothing ever happened but I reckon no society could be as strong or rather as detached to it’s members, to be unaffected by their loss.
Every civilisation has always had the inevitable tendency to collapse upon itself when violent forces become dominant over the peaceful ones. I am sure even you realise we cannot substantially safeguard ourselves against these extremists, whether home-bred or alien…for to do so, we must become extremists ourselves. Are we really at a point where we must? Anyways, this discussion leads to this (and I really wanna wind up, feelin darned sleepy):
Bikram Wisodm: War is the final act of cynicism that us mortals resort to, to impose our views onto others…so cynical is it, that eventually, religion springs anew in a bid to show us the path to peace…ironic is it not then, that religion seems to be the grounds for war at this time???
Another step in understanding human relationships (or in popular parlance, love) Recently I have been meeting several couples and in my humblest opinion, they are most definitely wrong for each other. As a matter of fact, I couldn’t think of two people more wrong for each other. What’s worse perhaps is that I stand vindicated in the fact the two just can’t get along on most occasions and perplexed, I try to subjectively understand why and how is it that they are still together.
In the process I have tried all lines of logical reasoning from the initial phases of attraction to perhaps some other emotion, perhaps lust? And yet, honest to god, I couldn’t for the life of me understand why it was that they were a couple! So after a considerable period of mulling over this, I finally began to see what it was that made them click. For all this time, I had been analyzing this along the wrong lines. I had over-looked the simple fact that if it works, it must be doing something right…instead of looking at what was right, like all other typical humans, i was looking at what was wrong. Eventually, when I finally got down to analyzing exactly what it was that was making them click, I was witness to a few couples in crisis to finally come to terms with the reasons. They weren’t together because they were the right people for each other. For all I know, perhaps even they realize that they are not the perfect images that they might have sought for themselves. Yet, they are able to understand human relationships better than yours truly because they feel so strongly for each other that they can not only fall in love with each other’s faults but also have the strength and courage to stand beside each other and be strong in the each other’s weaknesses.
Love is a strange and strong emotion. Some find it in just one person whilst the others struggle to find it in all the people they meet in a lifetime. And love isn’t about the right people being together, it’s also about all the wrong people being together for all the right reasons!
Have you seen the latest furor in the news due to the politics of regionalism? It isn’t something new as we all have been used to something of this sort over our lifespan.I am gonna make a very controversial statement here. I think it is good that we aren’t united as one and that we have divisions within society.
Confused? Agitated?
Yes, I said it. Nonetheless, in no way does this mean I condone the poilitcs of division more so the politics of division being played by the so called leaders of our nation (read the THACKERAYS) I say division is healthy because it means that the society is divided between groups of divergent thoughts. Different thoughts harbored by different sects of people only means that they are working towards a common goal along different paths. Which path is better, only time would tell but if different paths did not exist, society as we know it would not exist.
So what does this mean? Do I condone the fact that we should think of ourselves as belonging to different sects on the grounds of religion, regionalism or whatever else there is to it? No, like I said, we work towards a “common” goal and that for us is in the present context is India. Yet, to contribute to her progress, we must take different paths. Different paths do not mean that we are at each other’s throats and the only way we make progress along the path we are is by halting all progress along the other paths that our fellow citizens have chosen. If I belong to one state, it does not mean that I do not let another state make any progress nor does it mean that I do not let them pursue the path I have chosen. On the other hand, if another’s path is better than mine, it does not mean that I quit my path and hack the other out of his path to use it. What is required is for us to both to work towards a confluence of paths so as to be able to move forward together.
And no, we cannot stand together as one because we aren’t one, we are many. We can stand together as the many that we are by accepting the fact that we are different and that we each have our own views. Society is a market. The market cannot develop unless there is competition. The competition is futile if it isn’t healthy. We all are players in the market, we each have our own goods that have their own USP. How well we are able to utilize the strengths and work on the weaknesses is upto us.
Please do not be a counterview to proving I am wrong by saying we must act as one and we are Indians first because that line of thought in itself is rooted in the idea of divisionalism (is there a term as such? If not, you read it first here! Hehehe… ok, getting serious again…) because we are after all, humans first or perhaps living organisms first? I hope you understand what I am trying to say here. Division is a necessity to foster different ideologies and instead of nipping an idea in the bud, I always think it best to allow it to die a natural death. The idea of regionalism or religion isn’t a very bright idea for divisions but it would be wrong to condemn the idea of divisionalism. The further we make progress, the further we understand our differences and learn to utilize the differences to our advantage. As one, we cannot stand but if we accept the many that we are, I reckon we couldn’t fall…
I have spent more than a considerable amount of my awakened existence in trying to understand human relationships. Although by my own admittance, my research on the matter is far from complete, there are a few keen observations I have made especially about 22-25 year-olds. I suppose since I have reached a substantial conclusion about this particular age group, I could well put up my observations here.
First the guys… Guys will always crib and complain about girls being indecisive, unsure and subject to perennial mood swings but as far as relationships go, guys are a little worse off than girls. Guys will fall in love with a woman who is so unlike the woman of their dreams, they don’t realize they are in love! They will then spend their days convincing themselves that she isn’t the ‘one’ and that they are incompatible. Left to themselves, they will never admit they are in love to themselves leave alone the girl they are in love with! Unless friends counsel them of it, they will in all probability let her walk away without ever professing what lies in their hearts! (Well, since you don’t accept it to yourself, there isn’t a question of confessing is there?) The ironic part is, they realize it when she has already walked by and moved on!
In the occasion that through the counsel of friends they do acknowledge and profess their love or the rarer occasion that the girl herself reckons it is time to take control and is the one to profess, guys will be the uttermost idiots. Suddenly, after a lifetime of having dreamt of living with that one woman, they develop a commitment phobia! A million reasons (all of them baseless and useless) will crop up, from issues like incompatible families to we both want different things. Get real! She is the one! You let her go now and by the time you realize your folly, it will be tooooooo late!
Now the girls… Girls are pretty much sure about whom they want to spend their days with! If they set their hearts on one person, come what may, they will not change their decision. The guy could be a womanizer, a prick or simply moronic but the girl will never view the faults, heck girls are so weird, they fall in love with the faults!
But they aren’t without fault themselves. Most girls try subtlety as their most powerful weapon. They shower all their unshakable trust in the guy and expect the guy to understand that the show of faith in itself is a positive sign. I mean, yeah sure, it is a positive sign but god damn it, you shower the same kinda trust in your best friend! How the heck are guys supposed to know you love them? Guys hate subtlety and women need to understand that. Guys aren’t intelligent creatures blessed with an understanding of the finer elements, they are slow dumb creatures who can see no further than you show them! Take an example and show the guy stars (I mean the one’s in the sky, take him to the rooftop at night and show him the stars. Even if you live in Bombay and the night sky isn’t exactly lit up by stars, please do not bonk him in the head!) and all they will see are white dots. They cannot for all their lives, see the constellations or the heart that you are drawing with your finger. We can nod in agreement but only to appease you… Please do be a little more upfront about your views and feelings with guys!
Final advice to both girls and guys…if you spend most of your waking hours thinking about someone, you are definitely in love. When you find love, please be kind enough to acknowledge it and please, do not try to find excuses as to why it wouldn’t work out but try to find all the reasons it should…commitment fits really beautifully, you should try it on for size! All the best!
When you are 24 and still single, you know you are doing something wrong. Either that or perhaps there is something completely wrong with you. The worst place to do an analysis of the ongoing tumultuous phase in a single young man’s life is for him to be standing in front of a mirror, half-naked, with a towel draped around him. Well lets face it, if you know it is yours, you cannot dislike what you see right? You could have your ribs sticking out to the extent that you can count them all, right down to the floating rib and yet what you see are those abs that can be counted in the same way and you think to yourself “Ooohhhh…” Alternatively, you could have a ponch that says you’re 6 months pregnant and yet what you see are those gorgeous arms with a bulge for a muscle and then you go “Ooohhhh…”
And yeah, which moron do we know that looks in the mirror and says “Damn, I really look ugly!”
Or “Damn, that is one hideous face!” No one! When you look into the mirror, you go “Well hello beautiful!” and what you see are those streaks of wet hear running across your forehead in a gorgeous curve or if you happen to be bald, you can see fading traces of your hairline reminiscent of Zinedine Zidane! Or if you happen to have straight shaggy hair that just run across your face, you think to yourself “Ah! That’s my Tom Cruise look!” And then you walk away from the mirror thinking “Damn, those women don’t know what they are missing out on!”
~Sigh~
So then you look at your wardrobe. That faded and jaded pair of jeans…oh! Those are the best. They should make any girl go ga-ga! Then you look at the straight fit, brand new look jeans and you think “Now there’s the good boy look! How can a girl ignore that!” and of course there are the array of cargos, chinos, those brilliant corduroys, and lets not even get started on the shirts and the t-shirts! “Damn, those girls really have no sense of fashion!”
Get dressed and another look the mirror tells you, you aren’t looking that bad, a tuck here and little loosening there and the ponch has disappeared, or a little loose T-shirt and no one is the wiser about the number of ribs you have showing. A splash of aftershave and a dash of AXE and you’re ready to tackle the day. One last look at the full length in the mirror and you’re looking like a million bucks (atleast to yourself!)
Since you aren’t able to understand why you’re still single, you seek help from friends and so you ask your best friends (who happen to be girls) and they can’t help you either and so tell you to be patient. So you curse your stars for making you wait so long and then you start looking around to see if you can find some interesting faces around…
So why are you still single?
1.You can’t stop adoring yourself! Look beyond yourself and maybe you will see someone!
2.Clothes do not make a man, get a personality!
3.You’re surrounded by beautiful girls that you can’t seem to term as anything else but a best friend!
I am enthralled with the rains here in Bombay. I know there are so many who simply are disgusted at the deluge that seems to happen annually here but I am not one to complain. I simply cant stop brimming over the beauty and all the sights and sounds of Bombay in the rains… One of my favourite sights here in Bombay is the high tide at marine drive where the ocean simply can’t contain itself and the waves crash and spill over onto the road (or the pavement or promenade or whatever it is that it is called) Year after year I have come down to Bombay for just that one sight and six years down I still can’t contain my glee at the sight whenever I see it. This year was no different and yesterday I was strutting the walk on Marine Drive. Unfortunately though, I missed the high tide and was witness to a receding tide. It isn’t a half bad sight in itself but pales out in comparison to the rising tide and the fury with which the waves crash onto the wall. This is where the theory kicks in. The receding tide meant that only a few spots on Marine Drive were experiencing the spill over of the waves. Enthusiastic as I am, I couldn’t help be enticed at the distant sight of the waves spilling over whilst at my feet, the waves just came weakly and splashed the breakers leaving me to the mercy of the rain gods for the hope of getting splashed. Now generally I am either alone or with someone whom I am so comfortable, it is as good as being alone. Yesterday though I was with my room-mates. Don’t get me wrong, my roomies are my homies but there are still places of me I wouldn’t take them. So when I suggested at walking down the promenade, I was welcomed with “You’re kidding right?” looks. So I took off alone. Now I was walking fast, almost to the point where you might’ve called it a jog than a walk as I chased off to the spots where the waves were spilling over. Unfortunately, the further I made headway, the further the waves seemed to get! I walked almost the entire length and got splashed just twice! Well, after realizing my homies were outta sight, I decided to turn back. Wet with a couple of drops of the splashed water and looking skywards to see little or no hope of rain. So I slowed my walk to the typical pace of a Puneite’s walk. As I looked ahead, I saw some kids playing in the little puddles on the ground and lost in the moment, I sat down and watched them play in glee. After about ten minutes of just looking at them and smiling myself silly, I felt a drop of water on the back of my neck. And I looked behind to see a torrent of rain approaching and almost simultaneously being splashed completely by a huge wave! In the next ten minutes, it rained cats and dogs and the waves hit me with great regularity! And that’s when I realized- “The further you get, the farther it gets…when you stop chasing it, it catches you!” Or something along those lines! But that more or less is the wave theory--- you can’t catch a wave, the waves catch you!
