I was wondering why we fight so much with the people we love most...is it the burden of expectations that drives us to the limit causing tensions to flare?
Well, sort of. I think, the reason for misunderstandings and the resulting tensions, is a lack of understanding. As we get closer to people, we learn more about them. After a certain point, we start simulating their behavior in our mind, expecting and foretelling what they might or perhaps, ought to do! And when the results of the simulation are not quite the same as the reactions in real time, there are disagreements and arguments.
I believe, in a relationship, the degree of comfort shared is directly proportional to the amount of error we provide for in our simulations. In other words, the amount of freedom we are willing to give. The lesser the expectations, the better is it. The thing is, we can never hope to fully understand another human, no matter how long you've known them because we are such complicated beings.
Is it a wonder then, that the most comfortable relationships are those that are casual and have tons of space and the least amount of expectations?