To worry about what we have or haven't got,
I really wanna be a part of your story,
Steal a moment and make a memory...
Life knows no bounds,
Sometimes happiness and sometimes sadness does surround,
One of these days, it might just all end,
Who knows what is held around the next bend,
But whatever happens, I have lived this life,
To the fullest through all my joys and strife,
And it would have been incomplete without you all,
To hold me steady when I was about to fall,
So much that has come and gone,
So much that tomorrow might still be shown,
All those little bits of romance,
All those hopes of getting a second chance,
And I don’t know if people get to say good-bye,
But I know I wouldn’t wanna wait till the day the angels ask me to fly,
It’s been a good life and I wouldn’t change a thing,
The perfect ballad that all over again I’d love to sing,
If tomorrow I must walk into the depths of hell,
(and heaven’s outta bounds cause in my heart you dwell)
I don’t wanna go having left anything unsaid,
Love you till my dying breath, it stands confessed…
Just a premonition that said i oughta write a swan song...haven't quite had the best of times recently...
You could be all bad,
Inside, you could be a messed up wad,
You might even be selfish,
And yes I know I wasn’t the first one to share your kiss…
You might have been wrong,
Made a bad choice and lived with it for long,
You could even be evil,
And yes I know behind my back you have been the devil…
You could think I deserve better than you,
That maybe someday I will when I am through,
But whatever you do, don’t walk away,
All I want is for you to stay…
You can be as confused as you want to be,
Know it now, you are the reason life is enchanted to me,
You might even think that I probably am better off without you,
But to me nothing is worthwhile, without you…
I don’t know what the spate of the others around me is but for me, if there were some channels that I might block my kids from seeing, it would be the news channels…not the music channels with gordy videos, the sex in the videos is still tolerable, I am sure I can help my kids understand the truths of life. Not FTV even with their inevitable wardrobe malfunctions, I am sure the kids have the internet anyways so nude bodies shouldn’t be that big a deal. Not the “K” serials with all the unnecessary melodrama cause I have a remedy for that, I’ll introduce them to some fabulous comedy sitcoms to get over the K culture…but I don’t have a remedy for the “NEWS” channels…
Honestly, aren’t news channels supposed to deal with the daily events and happenings and deliver them to us? The first thing people do when they get up in the morning, is read the headlines of the newspapers. Consider that despite the fact that we live in a time when we have such fabulous connectivity we could access the other end of the globe at the click of a button and if we want to know what happened the day before we could switch on the tv and let someone else read out the news for us while we go on with our daily chores but do we do that? No! We still prefer reading our NEWS from a newspaper! Now why is that?
I’ll tell you why…because the NEWS channels do not deliver NEWS they deliver JUDGEMENT. Some NEWS is just pathetically sensationalized. I hate prying into someone else’s life but at this point of time I make an exception…the news these days is filled with the case of a double murder of a servant and a girl. Now what ticked me off most was the fact that before anything else, they start suspecting the father of the girl. Now I know the whole situation does leave the father as the prime suspect but the reasoning of one of the NEWS channels was because the father did not want to speak to the media after his daughter was discovered to have been murdered. WHAT? Are you kidding me? Which freak runs thses channels? You expect any father to be addressing the media after he has heard his daughter’s been murdered? The whole investigation isn’t complete yet and the police are no closer to solving the murder than they were on day one. I believe the constitution says “NOT GUILTY UNLESS PROVEN.” Are these so called NEWS channels now above the law of this country? Why can’t they just treat him as a suspect instead of labeling him a murderer yet?
Well, I don’t know what you think but I would like to state something for the NEWS channels and hope they take it seriously…
“THOU SHALT DELIVER NEWS NOT JUDGEMENT!”
I was watching The Wonder Years some days ago and Paul and Kevin had a huge rift between them. It almost broke their friendship and was a rather turbulent time for them both. The friendship did survive but they weren’t bonded like chewing gum and the sole of your shoe anymore. They both suddenly gave each other distance and more importantly space. And at the end of the show, as always, he makes a very profound observation and I found it very pertinent too… he said “That sometimes to grow together, you have to grow apart.”
True isn’t it? I know I have stuck onto my friends ever since school but we aren’t as close as we were back then. All of us have grown from being almost similar, to being completely different. And then there are best friends. I would have loved to keep things the way they were in “OUR” Wonder Years but then they cannot continue that way forever can they? All of us have a different point of view and a different perspective no matter how similar the situation. And each of us needs to grow individually. We cannot grow together cause then we keep holding each other back. Making sacrifices and choices you don’t want to, holding back just to be together until you reach a point when you both stop growing. And then, whether we want to or not, we must let go and move on.
Sometimes, it is better to grow apart. Sooner or later, when it is due, you shall grow together again… I know I did…
Today I shudder to think what life would have been like without google. Almost every activity that I pursue these days is extensively with google in the loop at some point or the other. Matter of fact being, that my whole life at this point in time is strung together with google as the joining thread for everything. Don’t get me wrong, I am not being paid by google for this article nor am I naïve enough to ignore the numerous other powerhouses that fuel the internet in this day and age…all I am saying is that for me, google is what defines life. And I know a lot of others out there who live a life like mine. Generation X, generation Y are both passé now, in this age, we are the generation G – for GOOGLE!
Be it a movie, google comes to the rescue with a quick search for an available show, don’t even ask about studies. I believe google has made the library obsolete and for a whole bunch of us, has been instrumental in providing us with a wide array of learning material and resources, all for free! (Or atleast I haven’t paid too much for it!) It has kept me connected with a whole bunch of people I would’ve otherwise not had a chance of staying in touch with (Including the crush from college whom I was too scared to talk to back then! Funny theory I have there, inspired by “The Wonder Years” more on that later…) Helps me talk to my friends across the seas for free! No charge! And if it weren’t for GTALK, I dunno what I would’ve done in my free time! (Probably ended up studying or reading! Imagine that!) Last but not the least, BLOGGER gave me the power to publish my thoughts and be creative. Without my blog, I assume I would’ve been missing a whole side to myself…
And yes there are a whole bunch of other similar portals providing as many services if not more than google. I though am one of those brand loyal morons and so it’s google for me!
(By goly, I am a slave to google…almost!)
For a long time now, (to be precise since march last year) I have been rather subdued and rather soft-spoken and gentlemanly. So much so, that people have actually told me I have matured a little and have sobered up! What was perhaps worse was the fact that I felt I had and felt the need to sober up even more! Terrible times for me I tell you. Perhaps the worst part was the fact that the greatest indicator of my persona, my driving style had been completely altered…it was less risqué and more sober and safe. I had completely stopped speeding and almost always had begun driving with a lot more sense and responsibility!
And then this week happened…I was reunited with my love…my first love! Ever since last march I have been far far away from her so much so that I had completely forgotten what it was like to be with her! After an eternity I spent an entire week in her company, caring for her first and then taking her out every single day! And then tonight, I found myself all over again…more so after a meeting my old schoolmates. They just remind me of myself from a completely forgotten dimension! On the way back, when I was feeling really elated having had met them, I left with her. And that’s when I suddenly revved and found what I was missing all these days. The wind in my hair, the dust in my teeth…and the rush of driving on the edge! Ever since I left Pune last March, I have never been able to head off, without direction and care with my bike. I did so today… At midnight, after having bid my friends good night, when I suddenly felt the impulse to go off on a long drive… and I did. After long days, I did. Without a pre-emptive plan or destination I did. And I loved it… and I now know what it is that was missing and why I have been such a wreck…after an eternity of self loathing and confounded solitude, I feel rejuvenated…I feel like myself!
The good news: I have found my mad impulsive streak again…
The bad news: I will be driving like a maniac all over again!
The good news: I am back…
The bad news: I am back!
If you have been following this space you might remember I had written about the rhyme scheme and my first poem. In another honest confession, the next poem I wrote was just before the HSC Exams long before I took to writing regularly whilst in engineering. Well, for all my troubles, (and more so of someone else who has over the years taken the trouble of piecing together all those shards of paper with my rhymes on them,) I found the second poem I had written. Not a maiden venture but perhaps valuable because it is the oldest draft of my poems still alive. Didn’t know whether or not to put it up here but after long contemplation (and a momentary feeling of spontaneity) I finally decided to put it up. So here goes:
(Oh! and it is mandatory to leave a comment here...)
Fell off my bike and had more than just a scrape,
Was taken to the hospital for the mandatory scan and tape,
I saw this nice girl who though was bald,
Asked her if Agassi she had dolled?
To me she then looked and gave a wry smile,
That icy stare could have frozen me from a mile,
“Well,” she stated and said in treatment she had lost,
Her auburn hair and her beautiful locks,
She said that radiation had slowly eaten through,
Not just her tumours but her body too,
She said that she had it in her lungs,
And one day she’d coughed blood whilst at her mum’s,
It was then that doctors and meds,
Had found the cancer that in her had bred,
The dreaded tumour though was small and wouldn’t kill,
But keep her nonetheless for a lifetime ill…
Then she told of the millions all over,
Who unlike her couldn’t afford the medical cover,
Told me about the thousands who would everyday count,
The days as the medications somehow kept the cancer off mount…
That day in the hospital, my breaks and pain I’d forgotten,
Felt ashamed for a change, of the impassive words I’d spoken,
Of my quaint little troubles and all the cribbing I thought,
And couldn’t imagine the pain with which she must’ve fought,
I felt sorry for all my misdeeds to that day,
Thought for my mistakes I needed to pay,
A new friendship with her I looked to start,
To learn from a lady with a lion’s heart,
How glad at the moment I had felt,
In words I am sure couldn’t be spelt…
So the next day a bouquet in hand I reached her room only to find it empty,
Distressed, I asked the sentry,
Who had news but only the worst,
Fond he seemed of her as in tears he burst,
And said that the fine young lady had last night in her sleep,
Passed on to the other side leaving us mortals to weep,
I joined her dear ones in another room,
Among strangers, I still felt comforted in my gloom,
Just a day and her loss was for me a shock,
I couldn’t even wonder how much their world she had rocked…
For that person who in a few brief moments had touched,
My life so deep, so rugged, so abrupt,
Involuntarily my eyes seemed to shed a tear,
One I had never shed for anyone, distant nor dear…
I have heard people complain about sleep disorders, more amnesia than anything else! Me and another friend of mine have quite another disorder though, quite the opposite of amnesia-not a lack of sleep but a little too much of it! The two of us can catch 40 winks anywhere and I really mean anywhere! It gets better…both of us can sleep like logs when we are at it too!
This is perhaps worse when we are travelling! Anything that moves can put us in an “I SO WANT TO SLEEP” mode. The minute I hop into a seat on a bus, train or plane, my eyes automatically start shutting themselves up! You know the first time I hopped onto a plane, I was really excited. Mom and dad, knowing how much I love planes thought I would be jumping up and down peeping through the windows et al! But I fell asleep ten minutes into the flight…
Well, I’d like to tell you I do better on firm ground but then I’d be lying…(and I prefer to be lying in bed!) (P-un-intended!)
P.S. : In regards to that matrimonial I put up, I must thank all of you who said it was great and would interest a lotta women! You were right too! I got a total of 000 responses! Since even that has failed, I guess I am doomed indeed!