Thursday, May 17, 2007

Doing the right thing…

Dunno if you know it, but lifes most difficult task is doing what is right in any given situation. Struggle with your conscience all you like and almost always you will end up justifying what is not right. Almost always we will do the exact opposite of what we should have done. Don’t get me wrong though, I am not saying its wrong to not do what is right, in fact, our happiness lies in all that is wrong… confused? Let me elaborate…

If you have ever been in love with someone, you will know that the very first day that you approached her or him, the right thing to do would have been to walk away. Yeah I know, im being old fashioned and typically Indian but think about it, how many of us are in relationships where we know that our parents would approve without any objections? Barely a handful. Then we get into relationships and even when we know we don’t have a future we will pursue it in hope more than anything else. Doing the right thing can only happen when you think with your head and not your heart. When you weigh out all your options and think logically before arriving at any decision. When you have made a decision where your conscience has also had a say and you are morally justified too. The right decisions are made when you have thought with a level head and are mentally headstrong. The right thing always requires sacrifice and courage.

Nonetheless, the right course of action only brings with it a whole lot of heartache and sadness. It brings with it tears and heartburn. It brings with it despair and realization that life is fragile. The right decision asks you to let go when you want to hold on. The right thing to do feels so wrong… so do the wrong thing and find happiness, even momentarily, its worth it… Life is too bloody serious it really wouldn’t matter if you made a few mistakes, its what makes life worth living. Not a world where you did everything the way it was supposed to be done but a world where you could do things based on a gut feeling, a world where you went against all the odds to fight it out with the person you loved. Imagine living in a world where everything was always right… yuck!!!

I have been thinking life through,
This is the most significant question I drew,
“What is the right thing to do?”
But would our lives be better if we knew?


Saurabh said...

This is what I think ...
There is no right or wrong in this world - you make your own right or wrong.

I don't know why, but people associate guilt with the feeling of happiness. Why do you need to sacrifice stuff to show that you are right?
It's a pathetic Indian mentality I think - and the main reason why we will glorify the people who died in battle but not the heroes who came back alive ...

Dude, life is for living - and if something makes you happy, then that is the right thing to do. You should not feel guilty about it.
Feeling guilty makes it wrong.

Your approach to life should be simple. You should figure out whether the consequences for pursuing something that makes you happy are worth the happiness or the effort and go for it (or not) depending upon what you feel without regrets later.

And yeah, never hope. When you hope for something, you are putting that something out of your control.

Mulling Over My Thoughts said...

nope, its not about feeling guilty. its more about choosing between what you want for yourself and what you should be doing for others. the right thing in terms of being selfless as opposed to being selfish. whom are you supposed to choose? yourself or the others in your life? should you sacrifice what you want for the sake of giving someone else what they want? which happiness do you choose? that which makes you happy but the others sad or that which makes you sad and the others happy? the right thing to do ofcourse would be entirely decided by your perspective as you have said but then again, is your perspective supposed to be right in terms of yourself or should it be one that has a seal of approval from everyone else too?
once again, what is the right thing to do???

Mulling Over My Thoughts said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Saurabh said...

Umm ...
I think you are over complicating matters.

Someone once told me love is as simple or as complicated as you make it out to be - and I agree with that.

Though you should not over simplify stuff, but you shouldn't complicate it so much that you can't figure things out.

People are logical creatures and you can always reason out with them. Everyone has a negotiable price. You can always convince people by showing them a point of view that they agree with.

The way I look at it is simple.
If doing something makes you happy which is worth making other people sad for, then go for it.
Otherwise don't.

If the other people are going to be sad for just a little while, compared to you being sad for your life, you have your choice there.

Sometimes, others will just forget about what they are doing to you or have done. Worse, they might not even realise it.
In such situations, it is not worth sacrificing stuff for them.

When you are sacrificing stuff, you must let them know that its going to be extremely hard for you and you're doing it because of them.

Otherwise, its just foolish to make your own life miserable for nothing.

Mulling Over My Thoughts said...

yup, agreed.
though im not the one making the choices here and struggling with choosing the right thing to do. i have already made my decision and my life has moved on. i was just thinking about what someone else is going through...
i know im stupid, i wish i could learn to be a little selfish someday... then again, i never learn from my mistakes do i?